Making the jeans fit

Classes started at the U this week, so Sarah and I are testing out this new life as dual grad students. One of the most tricky aspects of this enterprise is figuring out a schedule that will work for both of us. It's helpful that I'm on fellowship, but that also brings its own complications. Ostensibly, the U is paying me so that I don't have to worry about giving 20 hours of my time each week to assistantship duties. Yet Sarah has no such luxury, and she has several classes and workshops to attend each week to boot. Combine that with a baby and kindergartner, and a substantial section of my time each week is given to parenting/household duties.

During my orientation, there was much talk of pursuing our academic growth in grad school--staying focused on what's best for us academically, which is what our program is supposed to be doing. But in reality, attending all the workshops and events and reading groups I'm interested in just doesn't fit with the life of a dad/husband/homeowner. There's diapers to wash, babies to feed, and dinner to cook. Granted, most grad students are relatively unattached. But for those who came back a little later in life, this comes to feel like jeans that are a bit too tight. As Sarah posted earlier, this is just a job after all, and making room for other concerns is legitimate. Finding the proper balance, as with all of life, is difficult.